Friday, 12/29

As our shared calendar draws to an end for yet another year (really...where did 2017 go?), here's a story about a gift I receive every year for Christmas.

A calendar. Specifically, a calendar that makes he laugh my head off.

As I have every Christmas for a decade and a half now, I received my annual edition of the “365 Stupidest Things Ever Said” calendar and as I’ve done for the past decade and a half I read each and every page of it in one sitting. This accomplishes a couple of things--there’s a point where the cumulative effect of all that stupidity catches up with me, and whatever control I have dissolves in a big puddle. I start laughing uncontrollably, with tears running down my eyes, and for the next couple of minutes, I’m unable to do nothing else. Loraine then just stares at me for a second, and shakes her head the way she’d shake her head at a puppy trying to chase its tail and accidentally running itself head-first into a wall.

Except I do it on purpose.

The page that set me off this year? Read by itself, it’s not necessarily that funny, but when you consider I’d just read 200 or so other pages of stupid stuff; well, like I said, the cumulative effect was just something else. It was a newspaper headline about people concerned about a forthcoming ordinance in their community--

“Stiff opposition expected to casketless funeral plan”.

Get it? “Stiff” opposition? To funeral plans? Okay. Maybe it's just me. I mean, in and of itself it’s not gut-busting, but when placed near the end of a long line of stupid quotes, sayings, and newspaper headlines, it was the trigger that set off my annual bout of self-induced hysteria.

I know. . .I need help. What’s your point??

On that note, have yourself a great holiday weekend and a very happy New Year. Party smartly, and if you can't do that, party safely. See you Tuesday!

(jim@wmqt.com)

Thursday, 12/28

If, when everything thaws this Spring, you happen to see a right ear and part of a lower lip lying somewhere on the street, would you please pick them up?

They're probably mine.

I can't believe how cold it was when I went out running this morning. Of course, I can't believe that I actually went out running this morning in a windchill of about 150 below, but I did. In a concession to the weather I did actually wear long pants (several layers of long pants, in fact), but I did go out running. Call me crazy, if you'd like. You wouldn't be the first person to do so.

It's probably a good thing schools aren't in session this week, either. After all, with cold like this, I'm assuming schools would be shut down for the entire week anyway. And that got me to thinking. I really do not wanna sound like one of those people who start off every sentence with the phrase “Back when I was a kid”, but (ahem) back when I was a kid, I don't remember having school canceled because of something like the bitter cold we're currently experiencing. I remember being at school on days when the air was frigid and the wind chills were extreme. In all honesty, I don't recall if the conditions were as harsh as they are now, but it seems to me like they were, and yet I was still in school.

Now, though? Not so much. At least it doesn't seem like it.

I realize that there are legitimate (and very good) excuses for keeping schools closed when it's colder here than it is at the South Pole (seriously...McMurdo Station at Antarctica has been warmer than Marquette the past two days). I mean, the fact that I seem to have lost two parts of my body while out running today is basically the best reason for closing schools. Still, though, it just seems (at least to me) that they close and cancel things quite a bit more than they did (ahem) back when I was a kid. I don't know if it's true, I don't know if my perceptions are just askew. But all through my life—when I was a kid, and now that I'm what passes for an adult—I just seem to think that many more things went on as normal despite the bad weather.

Like I said, I don't know if that's actually the case or if my perceptions have been warped by whatever's been warping my brain since I was young. But I tend to think that it might actually be the case. After all, if I'm stupid enough to go out running on a day so cold that you lose body parts, I must've picked up the habit somewhere, right? There must be something in my brain that tells me it's okay to go out on a day when the wind chill's around 150 below.

Well, it's just a thought. Hopefully, some day soon, it'll start to warm up, and we won't have to ponder things like butter temperatures and the cancellations they cause. Hopefully, some day soon, I'll be able to run without losing parts of my face. After all, with only one ear and no more than one and half lips left, I'm rapidly running out of body parts left to fall off.

8-)

(jim@wmqt.com)

Wednesday, 12/27

Please don’t laugh, but I don’t think I got my fill of Christmas music this year.

See, you’re laughing, aren’t you? I don’t blame you, because by the time Christmas actually rolls around most normal people have heard enough Christmas music to last them for the next 11 months. But as we all know, I’m anything but normal, especially this holiday season.

Hence, the Christmas music I could still probably listen to.

Aside from what we played on the air leading up to the holiday, I really didn’t get a chance to listen to a lot of Christmas music this year. I listened to the usual discs when I was making cookies, and I listened to one of my favorites--“Soul Christmas”--a couple of times while wrapping gifts Friday afternoon, but that was about it. I just didn’t have time to listen to anything else. By my reckoning, I only heard “The Christmas Song” twice, “All I Want For Christmas Is You” three times, and in a stunning reversal from normal, I don’t believe I heard “Happy Xmas (War Is Over)” or Vince Gill’s sublime version of “White Christmas” even once this year.

Not once!

Unfortunately, the two “Christmas” songs I heard the most (and you did notice the quotes around “Christmas”, right?) were “Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer” and “Rusty Chevrolet””, if only because those are the two holiday songs for which we received the most Instant Requests. Those don’t really get the spirit of the season across, unless you consider the spirit of the season to be vehicular homicide or the need for a new car. In that case, those songs are fine; in my case, not so much.

I don’t think I’ll bust out any Christmas CDs any time soon; after all, holiday music isn’t the same after the holiday’s actually over. Maybe, though, it means I’ll look forward to it just a little more than usual next Christmas, and get a chance to listen a greater variety of artists than Elmo & Patsy and Da Yoopers.

That’d be okay with me.

                                                                  *****

Before I leave I do want to mentioned how saddened Loraine and I were to hear the news of yesterday's death of Tom Baldini, the mayor of Marquette.  I've known Tom since high school, when I was a student in his Advanced Political Science class, one of the things that helped turn me from a fledgling political junkie to a full-bore political junkie.  When he worked for Bart Stupak he was a big champion of Loraine's WWII research work, offering help if she ever ran into bureaucratic road blocks.  And he was also a fan of "High School Bowl".  When we passed each other on the streets he'd always make a comment about something he noticed during the previous week's show.

He was one of the good guys.  He will be sorely missed.

(jim@wmqt.com)

Tuesday, 12/26

No, they're not quite gone yet.

Among the notes I received from you guys over the last few days was one from daily blog reader Holly in Marquette, who wanted to know if the 31 or so dozen cookies I baked during the last week and a half are still floating around. With the exception of a few of this kind and few of that kind, Holly, I'm glad to say they're almost gone.

And about that, I couldn’t be happier!

I don’t bake the cookies for me to eat; in fact, Loraine often expresses amazement and/or disappointment over the fact that I make the cookies but don’t eat them. But while I do munch on one or two (mostly to make sure they turn out okay), I make them mostly to give away. After all, the holidays are all about giving, right? Especially if you’re giving (what did we figure out) 11 extra pounds of weight through all the cookies you bake?

Right??

One of the reasons I don’t eat all the cookies, and one of the reasons that I’m glad they’re almost all gone, is that I’m not sure if I wanna gain the extra two pounds the average American gains during the average holiday season. Now, I’m sure some of you are asking how I can be worried about gaining two pounds when I don’t eating my own baking, and I can safely answer this way—while I don’t eat my own baking, I sure do eat a lot of other people’s baking.

Once again, those of you who read this on a daily basis know what I’m talking about—ever since Thanksgiving, it seems like I’ve been writing about nothing other than trying to go to bazaars and holiday festivals and open houses and bake sales and cookie swaps. And while I don’t eat a lot at any one of those events, the sheer number of them that Loraine & I attend makes it inevitable that, like almost every American, I’ll gain those two pounds during the holidays.

Now, one of the reasons Americans have gotten so large over the past two decades is that, studies show, they never lose the two pounds they gain each holiday season. And while a pound or two might not make much difference in a year, you add them up over a decade, and you’re eventually 15 or 20 pounds heavier than you once were.

That’s why I don’t eat the cookies I bake. I make up for it in eating the stuff that OTHER people make and give to me. And that’s why I hit the ski trails and the running routes and the weights with added vigor during and after the holidays. I want to get rid of those two pounds I may have picked up.

Of course, now I need to apologize for giving all those cookies away and causing other people to gain their two pounds. I’ll admit it’s an imperfect system; all I have to do now is figure out how to make calorie-free Christmas cookies, and then EVERYONE can be happy!

(jim@wmqt.com)

Thursday, 12/21

Say hello to my little friend--

I'm not a big fan of Will Ferrell or the movie “Elf”, but I got to spend the day with Buddy the Elf yesterday, and it wasn't too bad. For those of you who don't know what's going on, our friends at the Delft Bistro in Marquette have their “Delft on a Shelf” promo happening through Christmas. They stick a life-sized cardboard cutout of Buddy the Elf in various places around Marquette, people take selfies with him, and they then have a chance to win goodies from The Delft.

Yesterday, Buddy spent the day at the station. For the most part, he was quiet and stayed out of the way, showing none of the manic tendencies for which he's known. However, I think he became bored sitting in our window, because he insisted on spending the afternoon with me in the studio. He was still behaving himself in there, at least until he started giving me the stink-eye when I wouldn't play “Baby It's Cold Outside”. Fed up a little, I told him that if he didn't stop I'd stick him out in the snowbank outside, where several dogs had just passed by to, uhm, take care of business.

He quit giving me the stink-eye after that.

I have no idea where Buddy's going after he leaves us, but hopefully it's to a home that welcomes him just as much as we did. Hopefully, he behaves himself there, and hopefully, he won't end up in someone else's snowbank

Although with him, you never know.

****

By the way, I'm off most of the day tomorrow to enjoy a three and a half holiday weekend, so there won't be a new one of these up. However, if you get really bored and really desperate to read something, you can also click HERE and check out the story of a Christmas Eve tradition for Loraine and me.

Have a great Christmas weekend. See you again Tuesday!

(jim@wmqt.com)

Tuesday, 12/19

I’m a guy, and I like it. Is it THAT big of a surprise?

Perhaps my favorite movie of the last 15 years is “Love, Actually”, a movie that kind of flopped when it came out in theaters but has now taken on a second life as a modern-day holiday classic (in this regard, it resembles “It’s a Wonderful Life”, something I’ll discuss in a bit). Anyway, it’s the tenth anniversary of the film’s release, and because of that there have been a slew of articles released about the movie, many of which deal with the same topic--

Did you know guys like “Love, Actually”?

Speaking as a guy, just let me say this--yes, some of us DO like “Love, Actually”. In fact, some of us LOVE “Love, Actually”, and I’m not quite sure why all these writers are surprised. I mean, sure, it doesn’t have any explosions, farts, or fights, and it’s filled with heart and humor, but that doesn’t mean guys don’t like it. In fact, I’ve always been a fan of Richard Curtis, the guy who wrote and directed the film, if only because his movies DO have heart & humor, and conspicuously lack explosions and farts, and when he does include fights, they’re usually between Colin Firth and Hugh Grant, and they’re hilarious.

So there.

Another of my favorite articles on the movie is one that asked people which of the nine subplots they liked best (for those of you who haven’t seen the movie, [and shame on you, by the way, if you haven’t], the movie juggles nine inter-related subplots in the 5 weeks leading up to Christmas), and that’s almost like asking someone which of their nine kids or puppies or classic cars or whatever they like best. I don’t know that I could pick my absolute favorite, although I will admit that I have a fondness for both the Hugh Grant and the Colin Firth story lines. The one that always gets to me, though, is the plot with Keira Knightly and the guy in love with her. Once again, I don’t wanna spoil it for anyone who’s never seen it, but if you aren’t in some way affected after watching that plot line, you’d better check to see if you have a pulse!

So there you go. I’m a guy, and I love “Love, Actually”. Think they’ll write an article about me, now??

8-)

*****

Okay, I mentioned how “Love, Actually” has pretty much followed the arc of “It’s a Wonderful Life” by being a box office failure at first, only to then become a beloved holiday classic. Well, that reminds me I need to check on something. A couple of years ago, there were plans afoot to make a sequel to “Wonderful Life”, in which the ghost of George Bailey’s youngest kid, Zazu, comes back to haunt George’s bratty grandson by showing him how much better the world would’ve been if he was never born.

That sounds like it’s full of holiday cheer, doesn’t it? And the actress who played Zazu in the original, Karoline Grimes, is coming back for this film. Why, why, why? And if this is the case, what’s next--a sequel to “The Wizard of Oz” in which Dorothy’s granddaughter skips out of rehab to join a doomsday cult?

I’ve been joking on the air the past few years about how the movie business has run out of ideas. Guess I wasn’t that far off, was I?

(jim@wmqt.com)

Monday, 12/18

Well, at least the cookies are done.

I've mentioned in here about how I've yet to accomplish basically anything to do with Christmas. I mentioned that I had hoped to tackle a big chunk of it this weekend, and you know what? I did. I baked 31 dozen cookies.

Why yes, I do wonder about my sanity, just like you do!

It did turn out to be a two and a half day process, Friday night & Saturday at our place and Sunday at my parents. And if I'm gonna be totally honest I'm not completely done yet. There are still a few cookies that need to get frosted. But they're baked and (for the most part) ready to go. And that's what counts.

Speaking of counting, I have this bad habit every year of trying to figure out how many calories I'm inflicting on friends and family by baking (in this case) 31 dozen cookies. So let's do a little math, shall we? If I baked 31 dozen cookies, that's 372 cookies. I'm gonna guess here, based on the different kinds of cookies I made, that each cookie contains 110 calories. That might be slightly higher than average for a cookie, but I make a couple of kinds (like my Grandma Cookie) that has some high-calorie stuff in it. So if I made 372 cookies at 110 calories each, that's 40,920 calories.

For that, I apologize in advance.

Let's see...if it takes 3,500 calories to gain a pound, I'm gonna be personally responsible for family and friends gaining a net total of 11 and two thirds pounds. While I generally think of myself as a thoughtful and kind person, one not prone to evil impulses, I take a look at that 40,920 calorie figure and wonder if, somehow, I've gone over to the Dark Side and don't even realize it.

Oops.

And I don't help things, either. I may make 372 cookies, but I probably only eat a dozen or so of them (at most) myself. As I mentioned, most of them are given away. After making that many cookies, I'm really not that hungry for them. It may seem weird, especially because I love baking cookies, but after all that work, I just don't feeling like eating them.

I can't explain it. That's just how it goes.

But at least the cookies are done, and the pounds are waiting to be gained. Now all I have to do is wrap my gifts and stick them under the tree. Once, of course, I head down into the basement and actually get the tree. But I'll get it done. Honest...I'll get it done!

8-)

(jim@wmqt.com)

Friday, 12/15

I don't know if I can wait two years for the conclusion!

First of all, the movie ("Star Wars: The Last Jedi") was amazing. It was pretty much everything I hoped it would be. The critics, unanimous in their praise, were spot on. In fact, it might—might--even be the best “Star Wars” movie yet.  I can not wait to see how it all turns out, even though I'll have to.  But, like I promised yesterday, that's all I'm gonna say about that.

Of course, that doesn't leave me much to talk about, and since I have to go shoot the third “High School Bowl” episode we've shot in the last week, I'll just leave you with this random thought--

If you see me at all these weekend, odds are I'll be covered in cookie dough. This is the weekend I hope to get all the baking done that I've been writing about the past month. It'll be double duty, too; I'll be doing it at our place Saturday and my parents' place Sunday. By Monday I'll probably never want to see another cookie again.

Until, of course, I start eating them and giving them away, and remembering WHY I bake them all in the first place.

And finally of all, did I mention that I saw “Star Wars: The Last Jedi” last night? And that it was good?

Just wanted to pass that along.

8-)

With that, have yourself a great weekend. If you're joining me in trying your own Cookie-thon, good luck and have a great time. If you were smart enough to get all this done weeks ago, congrats. You deserve every second of freedom you get this weekend!

(jim@wmqt.com)

Thursday, 12/14

Tonight's the night.

At 7pm tonight, I will be sitting inside theater 1 at the Thomas Theater Group's Tri City Cinema 8 in Marquette, eagerly awaiting the finish of 9,000 commercials and trailers. At the conclusion of the 9,000^th, the theater goes dark, the anticipation builds to an unbearable crescendo, and the world rocks slightly on its axis.

Either that, or “Star Wars: The Last Jedi” begins. You take your pick.

I had to laugh slightly when my friend Deanna bought our tickets over two months ago. After all, who figured that you'd need to buy tickets that far out just to see a movie on an opening night, right? But I'm glad she did; if she hadn't, I can guarantee we would not actually just be able to walk up and buy tickets to the film. That's how sold out the movie is. And I think we'll be in good company. I've spoken with many people I know, everyone from friends to “High School Bowl” team coaches, who'll be there.

It should be a blast.

One of the things I'm enjoying about the build-up to the premiere is how many people are trying to make it a spoiler-free event. People who've already seen the movie are going out of their way not to spill any secrets, just like the people who made it. And I'm going to honor that. For the next week, I'm not going to mention anything about the film—expect for incessantly gloating about how I saw it opening night—so that people who haven't had the chance to see it get to go in and experience it for themselves. I know that's how I'd want to do if if I didn't have a friend that bought tickets two months ago.

Have I mentioned I how much I appreciate Deanna's foresight?

As a result, you'll be able to come back here tomorrow and know that this will be a spoiler-free zone. Of course, I have the feeling that the vast majority of you—people much more grounded in reality than I—don't really care about what happens in the new “Star Wars” movie. But just in case, I'll write about something else. I mean, I don't know what I'll be able to write about, seeing as how I'll (hopefully) still be locked in a “Star Wars” high, but we'll see. I'm sure I can some up with something.

It's the least I can do.

8-)

(jim@wmqt.com), uber-nerd.

Wednesday, 12/13

Okay. Even I think they have have gone a little overboard.

As you may have heard, the most anticipated movie of the past two years (and I'm only being slightly sarcastic here), “Star Wars: The Last Jedi” opens tomorrow night. And as you may have heard, there are a few people (me included) really looking forward to it. They had the world premiere Saturday night, and everyone who saw it seemed to love it. The (spoiler-free) reviews I've read say it may be the best of the films, and that's saying something. But you know who probably really loves it?

Merchandisers.

Sunday morning, Loraine was looking through a few newspaper flyers and noticed that there seemed to be Star Wars licensed merchandise EVERYWHERE. I can't say I'm surprised; after all, the franchise was heavily merchandised even  before Disney bought the rights to it, and you know what Disney does when they get their hands on things. This, though, seems to have become almost a parody of itself. Just about anything you can buy you can now buy with a tie-in to Star Wars” included.

Don't believe me? Here's a list, taken from store flyers from this past Sunday's Mining Journal (so I think I'm missing quite a bit)--

“Star Wars” toys of all kinds

“Star Wars” puzzles

“Star Wars” books

“Star Wars” video games

“Star Wars” action figures

“Star Wars” toddler clothes

“Star Wars” kids clothes

“Star Wars” junior clothes

“Star Wars” adult clothes

“Star Wars” pajamas

“Star Wars” underwear

“Star Wars” makeup

“Star Wars” watches

“Star Wars” rings

“Star Wars” necklaces

“Star Wars” wrapping paper

“Star Wars” tree ornaments

“Star Wars” Life Savers

“Star Wars” Pez dispensers

“Star Wars” cereal

“Star Wars” sleeping bags

“Star Wars” boomboxes

“Star Wars” night lights

“Star Wars” Bluetooth speakers

“Star Wars” luggage

“Star Wars” shower curtains

and, finally,

“Star Wars” waffle makers

What? No “Star Wars” Home Pregnancy Test? Or does that come out nine months from now?

Now, I don't mind SOME merchandising; after all, the thought of a waffle in the shape of the Death Star does seem intriguing. But “Star Wars” luggage? “Star Wars” shower curtains? “Star Wars” eye shadow and concealing cream? Somewhere, in an alternate timeline, the teenage version of me who saw the original movie when it first came out is rolling his eyes.

Or kicking himself for not getting in on the action.

But what do you expect? While many of us think of it as more than just a movie franchise, Disney paid four billion (with a “B”) dollars for the right make more movies in order to be able to sell this stuff. I guess I can't begrudge them that. But still--”Star Wars” waffle makers?

Sometimes, the mind boggles.

(jim@wmqt.com), at T-35 or so hours and counting!

Tuesday, 12/12

Oh, those Germans. Those wacky, wacky Germans.

Some of you may recall that Loraine and I are going to Germany next year to follow in the footsteps of 'ol King Ludwig II, whom I once described as “the Brian Wilson of Bavaria”. In her research to put the trip together, Loraine discovered that there's a musical (called “Ludwig 2”) that's based on his life. As it turns out, the musical is being performed in the town of Fussen the night that we're there, so it looks like we're going to see a musical (in German) while we're in Germany.

We have no idea what we'll be seeing, but we've been promised a spectacle.

We were able to download the tickets after we purchased them, and we had to laugh when we saw them. Germans, in case you don't know, are sticklers for following the rules. A few years ago, when walking around a German town with a local resident, I made the mistake of of trying to cross a street in the middle of the block, and not in the marked crosswalk. I was told that I really SHOULD cross in the crosswalk, which I them did. The lady who told me that wasn't being mean or snotty or anything; Germans just follow the rules and laws of society. That's what they do. And they feel it's their civic duty to point out if you cross the street in the wrong place or drive too fast down the street or make noise when (or where) you're not supposed to.

Many days, I wish more Americans were like that.

Anyway, we downloaded our tickets, and had to laugh a little when we saw what we needed to do with them. When you present your tickets to get into the musical, you can't just give them the piece of paper upon which they're printed. Nope; you need to give them the tickets folded. And to make sure you fold them properly, they included some rather detailed instructions (in English, of course) on exactly HOW to fold the piece of paper.

Not only are you told EXACTLY how to fold your tickets, but the printout actually has helpful lines printed on the ticket so that you fold it correctly. And fold it correctly, you must; after all, it does say that if the ticket isn't folded exactly as described, you can be denied entry to the production.

And we wouldn't want that, would we?

Knowing just how much of a stickler for rules most Germans are, we both had to laugh. I mean, we knew they were tough, but instructions on how to fold a piece of paper? That makes being told where to cross the street child's play. Thankfully, we printed out several copies of the tickets. After all, if we make a mistake we wanna make sure we can start over again, and do it right.

That, after all, is the German way, right?

(jim@wmqt.com)

Monday, 12/11

I'm saying this with a smile, but geez...kids these days.

When I last left you I was about to head over to a taping of “High School Bowl”, and that's where this story takes place. We were doing a couple of practice questions before taping starts, a necessity when you have a dork as the host of the show. The practice question I asked regarded a luminary in the history of pop music, someone so important that his music has been sampled on hundreds of songs, a movie has been made of his life, and an entire generation of singers, everyone from Prince to Bruno Mars, has called him a major influence on their careers.

Yet none of the eight students to whom I posed the question, eight of the brightest young people on the planet, had any idea who James Brown was.

I know, right? How can you NOT know who “The Godfather of Soul” was? “I Feel Fine”? “Papa's Got a Brand New Bag”? Even “Living in America” if you around during the 80s? But nope; the question had all of them stumped, and out of the corner of my eye I could see the coach of one of the teams just put his head in his hand and shake it a few times, as if not believing what he had just not heard.

I felt his pain. I really did.

Now, I guess have two thoughts about this. Part of me really can't blame teenagers for not knowing exactly who James Brown was. After all, his last big hit was 30 years ago and he himself died a decade ago. But the other part of me just wants to shout out “You HAVE to know who James Brown was. His musical DNA is part of almost every song recorded since the 1960s. How can you NOT know who James Brown was?” The students knew who Prince was, because I asked. They certainly know who Bruno Mars is. But they had no idea about from whom those two artists drew (or draw) their inspiration.

I did leave them, though, with the promise that they'd Google James Brown, and find out a little about him. Maybe, just maybe, they'll then realize what an influence he was on pop music the last 50 years, and maybe, just maybe, they'll be ready to then answer a question about the Godfather of Soul should it ever pop up again. That's the least I could do.

Kids these days...

8-)

(jim@wmqt.com)

Friday, 12/8

Because I have to go shoot what is now the first of three episodes of “High School Bowl” in the next seven days in a few minutes, I'm gonna leave you with a topic that crossed my mind as I was out running yesterday, a topic I wrote about almost four years ago to the day.

I guess it proves things never change, right?

Have yourself a great weekend. Back Monday with something brand new!

(jim@wmqt.com)

***

(as originally posted December 10^th, 2013):

I wonder how many are given out on any particular night?

Now that winter’s here some of my usual running routes are curtailed, and I find myself running more and more on city streets, instead of the usual Fit Strip or bike path or Park Cemetery or other off-road areas. While I’m usually not keen on street running (especially with the way people drive these days) I do get to notice one thing that you never see while running during the summer.

And that’s tickets on cars that have violated Marquette’s overnight parking ban.

Depending upon where (and for how long) I run I’ll see anywhere from 2 to 5 or 6 cars with tickets on them, but I really noticed it Saturday morning when I went out and saw 4 tickets on just one block. That made me pay close attention; by the time I got home, I counted 14—fourteen—cars with tickets on them. And while I didn’t check each individual ticket, I can say with a fair amount of confidence that those cars were ticketed for violating the overnight ban.

Especially the car that had been plowed in for what looked like several days, as evidenced by the multiple tickets stuck under the windshield wiper. Someone’s gonna have fun paying those tickets, and also paying for getting their car plowed out!

I don’t wanna sound like I’m stereotyping a whole group of people, but I notice that a large majority of people who seem to have ticketed cars get those tickets in neighborhoods with a lot of college housing. I mean, I live I one of those neighborhoods, and that’s where I saw those four cars in one block with tickets stuck under their wipers. On one hand, I suppose I hafta give credit to whomever the cars belonged; I’m guessing they got a little too carried away with their celebrating, realized they weren’t in any condition to drive, and just left their cars where they parked them. That’s great. But after spending what I’m guessing is an amazing amount of money on booze, do you really want to add in another $50 (or whatever the price is) for a ticket, as well?

I’d be curious to know how many of those tickets the Marquette City Police give out on a nightly basis during the winter. I’d also be curious to know how many of those tickets are actually paid, and how much money the city makes off of them on an annual basis. I’m guessing it’s not a small amount, but who knows. Maybe the tickets can pay for a new patrol car or breathalyzer or bulletproof vest. At least something good would come out of it.

For now, though, I’ll just look at the tickets I see as one of the (few) perks of running in Marquette in winter. Sure, you’re slipping on ice, and dodging cars that are driving too fast, but at least I know that when I get done I won’t see that little yellow envelope stuck under my windshield. Because that, I would guess, would not make a run (or going out to your car) very much fun at all.

Wednesday, 12/6

They're on their way there. See? It isn't that hard.

I know I've probably railed about the misuse of the different forms of “there” in the past, so forgive me if I'm babbling babbles that I've already babbled. But there was a meme going around on Facebook this morning in which someone posted that people join an organization because “there to stupid to do anything else”.

Ladies and gentlemen, I believe we have the very latest definition of the word “irony” right there.

I'm starting to wonder if this whole “there/their/they're” problem is the latest version of the “chicken & the egg” quandary. Are people just grammatically stupid overall, and we notice it more these days because they post everything they write on the internet? Or has technology—the internet and spell-check—made people stupider, so much so that they don't actually know which “their” to use here and there?

Some days, I just don't know.

Now, I make a lot of grammatical & spelling errors when I write, as those of you who read this are no doubt aware. I rely too much on spell-check, and each and every one of these could probably use an extra round of proofreading, the time for which is, unfortunately, limited. So I'm not claiming to live in a glass house. I'm not claiming to be a perfect writer myself. But if I were to post something accusing someone else of being stupid?

I'd make sure I wasn't an idiot myself. But then, that's just me.

I'll shut up about this now, as my schedule for today has been thrown a bit askew and I have to figure out what to do. You see, I was supposed to go hang out with people who, I'm guessing, actually DO know which “there” to use, four teams of some of the brightest young people on the planet, who were to be taking part in another action packed edition of “High School Bowl”.  However, the weather in the western UP (from where two of the teams were coming) has pushed that back to Friday.  Hopefully, the weather will have cleared up by then, and the teams can make it to here from there.

Just not their. Or they're.

(jim@wmqt.com)

Tuesday, 12/5

I was able to do one of them yesterday. Unfortunately, I couldn't do both.

Another birthday has come and gone, and first of all I'd like to thank everyone who sent along their best wishes, whether in person or online. I do appreciate each and every one of them.

I was kind of surprised when a small yet sizable subset of those people asked if I was going to repeat “Birthday at the Beach” yesterday. For those of you who don't recall, two years ago it was 60 and sunny in Marquette on my birthday, so I spent a little time at the beach that day. After all, if you have a December birthday, you don't often get to spend that birthday at the beach. When I did it, I was SHOCKED by the number of people who thought it was an amazing idea; even Loraine had a bunch of her co-workers ask if I went to the beach that day. And based on the comment I received yesterday the concept must've made quite the impression.

So sorry to disappoint everyone, but rain and temperatures in the 40s (and skies so dark the streets lights stayed on all day) wasn't exactly beach weather, even for someone who would go to the beach every day if he could. But trust me—if it's ever warm & sunny again on my birthday, we're ALL going to the beach.

You have no choice in the matter, apparently.

However, I was able to do one thing on my birthday that's just as quirky and just as strange. Remember last month when I wrote a blog about wearing shorts to run at least once every month this year? Well, I completed the cycle yesterday morning; since, as I mentioned, it was 44 degrees, well above the 32 degree minimum for wearing shorts while running, I did something I never thought I'd be able to do (or, at least be able to do while I was still in possession of most (if not all) of my faculties)--I have now run in shorts at least once a month every month of a calendar year.

Who would've thought.

Finally, before I go, I have to thank my young friend Jaxon for one of the most unique gifts I've received recently--

How many of YOU have a hand-made cow Christmas ornament? I thought so!

(jim@wmqt.com)

Monday, 12/4

Well, I made it through the weekend. And I didn't explode!

That's right; those two days of (basically) non-stop gnoshing and snacking that I wrote about Friday are now over. The Greek food was, as always, amazing, the baked goods we picked up at sales and ate at the Library Open House were yummy, and the (early) birthday treat of pumpkin bars and mint chocolate chip ice cream was scarfed down with abandoned.

Now, I just need to figure out how I'm gonna eat all the extra pumpkin bars I brought home.

A couple of years ago someone asked me why I have pumpkin bars instead of a birthday cake when the anniversary of my world premiere rolls around, and I have no real answer for them, other than to perhaps say that I don't like to do what everyone else does. I know that's not a real answer; the answer is that I just really like pumpkin bars. At one point in my life my mom made pumpkin bars instead if a birthday cake, and it's stuck ever since.

Not that I would have it any other way.

I in no way mind taking all those extra pumpkin bars home; I would eat them every day if I could. I'd probably be 1,000 pounds heavier than I am, but I'd eat still eat them every day if I could. I just wish, on occasion, that church bazaar day, the day on which I eat more food than perhaps any other, wasn't so close to my birthday. It'd be nice to spread it all out a little, you know? And there have been many years when church bazaar day falls on my actual birthday, so in one intensive 24 hour period I'm bombarded with all the food I've been describing the last few days. That always take a while to get over.

Luckily, though, not this year. Now, I have a couple of days to rest, recover, and eat nothing but fruits and vegetables in a vain attempt to clear my body of all the delicious yumminess I've been consuming. And yes, I DO remember I have all those leftover pumpkin bars to finish. The good thing about that?

Pumpkins are technically a fruit, so I can try to convince myself I'm actually eating with my health in mind. I'm just not so sure I'd actually believe what I'm trying to sell.

(jim@wmqt.com)

Friday, 12/1

Tomorrow's one of my favorite days of the year.

Tomorrow is what Loraine and I jokingly call “church bazaar” day, but it's so much more than that. Tomorrow, the Greek Orthodox Church in Marquette is holding their amazing annual Greek bake sale, filled with some of the yummiest food you'll ever taste. Meanwhile, St. Paul's Church is holding an international craft fair (and bake sale), while the First Presbyterian Church is holding their annual holiday bake sale. Tomorrow afternoon, Peter White Public Library's holding their annual holiday open house & cookie fest (where you can see Loraine's usual Gold Star tree). Then Sunday I get to celebrate a day early by eating birthday pumpkin bars and mint chocolate chip ice cream.

By Sunday night, I'll be uttering those infamous words--”I'm never gonna eat again”.

I don't know what it is about the confluence of all those events that makes Loraine and me celebrate like we do when it rolls around, although you may have noticed that food probably plays quite a huge role. But there is something else to it, too. All of those events that I described? The bake sales, the open houses, everything? They all occur within a four block radius of where we live. We hop out of our apartment Saturday morning and just wander through all of these really cool events before strolling home with whatever we've picked up. For some people, picking out a Christmas tree or visiting Santa or singing carols is how they get into the holiday spirit.

For us, it's spending the weekend walking to all of these events and just seeing what there is to see. And that's not even counting some of the other events that occur within that four blocks radius—performances of “The Nutcracker”, visits with Santa, and much, much more. Remember a few days ago when I wrote about how lucky I realized we are living where we live? Well, this is just another example of how it's true. Sure, this time it doesn't involve a beach. It just involves Greek food, baked goods, and birthday ice cream.

What more could you want?

On that note, I hope you all have a great weekend. If you're in Marquette, I hope you get the chance to check out some of those events I mentioned. If not, I hope that your community gives YOU something to help get you into the holiday spirit!

(jim@wmqt.com)

Wednesday, 11/29

I think it's gonna take a while to break this habit.

In a decision I think is horrid for the environment, those of us who live in the city of Marquette will no longer be able to recycle glass along with our plastics, paper, & metals. The news came after the city signed a new trash deal with Waste Management, and took a lot of people by surprise. Apparently, there's no money to be made in recycling glass, and the glass we have been recycling has been pulled out of the bins and tossed in the Marquette County landfill for several months now.

That's not good news.

As some of you may know, I've been an avid recycler since, well, forever. I think that's one of the things about growing up in the late 60s and early 70s, during the height of the environmental movement. It's something I learned about as a kid and something I've done ever since. In fact, I recycle so much that I only have enough actual trash to fill a city bag once a month.

I'm guessing that number's gonna go up soon.

I have no idea why it's no longer cost-effective to recycle glass. I mean, I know it's made out of sand, and I'm guessing it's probably cheaper just to dig up new sand than to recycle the old stuff. But I did a little research—did you know that glass can last up to two MILLION years before it breaks down in a landfill? Two million! Think of it this way--modern humans (Homo Sapiens Sapiens) have only been around 200,000 or so years, which means that we're making materials that will last at least 10 times longer than we've been around as a species. That blows my mind. And that also makes me wonder just how much glass will be sticking around the Marquette County Landfill long after we have a species have either blown ourselves up, evolved into whatever comes next, or have been enslaved by our new robot overlords.

The capper of it all is this—for several weeks now, even though I've known better, I keep washing out all the glass bottles and containers I use. It's force of habit; I've been recycling for so long (and trying to be hygienic when I do it) that I'll still clean an empty glass container out without even giving it a second thought. I mean, I know that I can just toss it in the trash, but there's a default setting inside me that makes me want to recycle the container, even if the city says I can't any more. I'm pretty sure it'll take me a while to break the habit.

Hopefully, it just won't take as long as the glass will last in a landfill.

(jim@wmqt.com, disappointed recycler.

Monday, 11/27

There's no way it's been 15 years...has it?

Fifteen years ago today I wrapped up a HUGE project that had taken up four months of my life. At the time, we were broadcasting from a dumpy, drafty, dusty space in Ishpeming, a space that really wasn’t a good one for a modern radio station with computers and high tech equipment. So thanks for the foresight of the late Joe Blake, we found a nice space in downtown Marquette that fit our needs perfectly, we moved what we could down from Ishpeming (and donated the rest to Westwood High School), and after a VERY long construction and conversion process, we began broadcasting from our current home fifteen years ago today.

So happy anniversary (in a way) to us, I guess!

I can tell you the exact time we began broadcasting from Marquette on November 27^th, 2002. That would be 5:45pm. And I can even tell you what song we played when we began broadcasting from Marquette that afternoon; that would be U2’s “Beautiful Day”. And although that song was a random choice, it was indeed fitting, not only because it wrapped up months and months of very hard work, but because of everything that our move has allowed since then, everything from broadcasting right outside our door for ball drops and bike races and food festivals to how I now live my life.

And in those fifteen years my life has changed considerably. I no longer have to drive to Ishpeming five to eight times a week; instead, I walk down Front Street whenever I feel like it. I no longer have to plan ahead to take a vacation; instead, if it’s a nice day outside, I’ll take a few hours off and enjoy the weather or enjoy the beach, and not have to worry about killing a huge chunk of the day driving back & forth. In all honesty, back in 2002 I was getting to the point where I was getting burned out going back & forth to Ishpeming all the time and wasn’t sure if I wanted to keep doing it; after the move, I was immediately re-energized, and I haven’t looked back since.

As with many things, it does not seem like it’s been a decade and a half since this all happened. It seems like it’s been a couple of years, at most. But it has indeed been fifteen years, a fifteen year span in which we’ve accomplished a lot of things from this studio, everything from frying eggs on the sidewalk and holding a bake sale out front for NMU to raising money for drug dogs and hosting Olympians, rock stars, and all kinds of really great people for all kinds of really great causes. And maybe that’s why it doesn’t seem like it’s been a decade and a half. We’ve just been having too much fun to realize just how quickly the time is passing.

So that’s the big anniversary we’re celebrating today. If for some strange reason you hear “Beautiful Day” at 5:45, now you’ll know why!

(jim@wmqt.com)

Wednesday, 11/22

Am I missing out on something by not eating stuffing?

A couple of years ago on our “Tuesday Topic” we asked listeners about the food they most enjoy on Thanksgiving. And I have to admit I was a little surprised when the winner was stuffing. Not turkey, not pumpkin pie, my two favorites, but stuffing.

Really?

I think this proves a couple of things, one being that it's further evidence I'm not like other human beings. I've never liked stuffing, and I don't know that I ever will. I don't know why; I like many of the ingredients that go into stuffing. But I guess I've just never liked the overall end result, per se, of stuffing. I don't know if it's the flavor, the texture, or the fact that it's usually shoved up a turkey's butt to cook. For whatever reason, I personally don't like stuffing.

But I know I'm in the minority here. I know that every other single person with whom I traditionally share my Thanksgiving dinner adores the dish. And they're probably happy I don't like it. After all, it just means more for them. From the sounds of it, I'm guessing this would also get replayed in any other households where there are a bunch of stuffing lovers and one naysayer. The people who love the dish—the vast, vast majority of people—get a little more because there's one person who, for whatever rational or (ahem) irrational reason doesn't like it.

You know...like at any Thanksgiving dinner where I'm a guest. Unless, of course, someone figured out a way to make it with chocolate. Then, just maybe, I might consider it.

Maybe.

8-)

On that note, I hope that you and everyone with whom you might celebrate has a great day tomorrow. There won't be another one of these until Monday, although I will be on the air Friday should you find yourself so insanely bored that you don't have anything else to do.

Happy Thanksgiving!

(jim@wmqt.com)

Tuesday, 11/21

Who knew so many people also miss Big Lots?

After writing yesterday's entry about how I've missed the store since it closed its doors in Marquette a couple of years ago, I was stunned by the batch of e-mails I received from people who said that they too missed wandering around its aisles, looking at some merchandise that no one in their right mind would like while at the same time stumbling across the occasional hidden treasure tucked in the shelves.

Wow.

Now, I'm sure the e-mails I received are not a proper sample size, and may just reflect the fact that people with a skewed outlook on things read this (or are at least driven to send me notes). But the outpouring of affection I received about the store makes me wonder why it pulled up stakes in Marquette in the first place. I mean, I know it closed because it “lost” its lease (corporate-speak for “they just didn't want to be here any more”), but obviously there were people who enjoyed going there. And if you extrapolate the number of people who sent me notes, factor it into how many people read this on a daily basis, and then extrapolate that number into the current population of Marquette County...

Well, actually, I have no idea what that number would be, or even if it would mean anything. But it just seems to me that the store, while here, banked a lot of goodwill among the people who visited it. At least, that's what I inferred by reading the e-mails I received yesterday.

Thanks for sending them along. Now, Big Lots, if you ever wanted to come back into the market, I know a group of people who would be there waiting for the doors to open!

8-)

*****

Before I go I have to do one thing, and that's wish the Most Amazing Woman in the World a happy birthday! That's right; it's Loraine's big day today, and while she's luxuriating in a day off of work (she's one of those lucky people who gets their birthday as a paid day off), and enjoying the birthday cookies I made for her last night (pecan chocolate chip, if anyone's curious), I just wanna make sure that this is another of the 12 or 13 ways in which I'll be wishing her a great day. I know I write in here all the time about the incredible stuff she does and about how she helps makes me a better person, and I appreciate the fact that you allow me to do so. I can't imagine what life would be like without her, and I'm just overjoyed that I get to celebrate it with her.

So happy birthday, Loraine!!!!!!!!!!

Hugs, kisses, and all that good stuff,

(jim@wmqt.com)

Monday, 11/20

Don't laugh, but I really kinda miss Big Lots.

I know; I don't necessarily seem like the Big Lots kind of guy, do I? And I really wasn't. After all, when the store was open in Marquette I would only visit it once or twice a year (so yes, I'm to blame for it closing two years ago, I guess). But it was around this time of the year that I'd pop in, and it was probably not for the reason you'd think. I didn't like to go to Big Lots for their collection of off-brand merchandise and factory seconds, or for their overly fluorescent lighting.

Nope—I liked to go to Big Lots because you would've found that the store had somehow amassed this amazing collection of interesting foods from around the world. Over the years I'd picked up blackberry jam from Turkey, cheese gnocchi from Italy, and a package of raspberry filled chocolate cookies from Poland, just a few of the many treats I found there.

And that's why I'm sad they closed their doors and never looked back.

Aside from the oddities of international food you could've picked up at the store I can also vouch for another service provided by Big Lots when it was around. If you had found yourself in need of a small, shall we say, out of the ordinary gift for an upcoming holiday season you could've found one while looking through the food shelves of Big Lots. Not only did they have a bunch of snacks and treats from around the world, but you could always find something weird from here in the USA, as well.

Case in point? A couple of years ago I needed a small gift that cried “strange”, and I found it at Big Lots? What was that gift, the one that cried “strange”? How about Elvis Presley flavored hot chocolate. That’s not to say the hot chocolate was flavored like Elvis Presley which, if I had to guess, would taste vaguely of fried banana sandwiches and painkillers. Nope; it actually had different flavors you’d expect from hot chocolate, flavors like mint & caramel. But just the fact that you could get “Elvis Presley” brand flavored hot chocolate at a store (at least at a store someplace outside of Memphis, where everything has Elvis’ picture on it) was one of the prime reasons why I would visit Big Lots once or twice a year.

And that's why, especially this time of the year, I kinda miss it.

(jim@wmqt.com)

Friday, 11/17

I'm ready for summer to come back.

Yes, I know we just finished summer (or “summer”, as some of us refer to it, seeing as how this year we really didn't have much of one), but I'm more than ready for it to come back. The sunless, cold, snow-filled days of yuck that we've experienced pretty much the entire month of November have pegged the “blah” meter up past 100, and the fact that we still have months of this to go is almost enough to make one throw up their hands.

Almost.

So, because it's (almost) the weekend and because I refuse to give up without fighting the good fight, here are some pictures, taken during this past “summer”, that have two things in them—sun, and color. In fact, more color than we'll probably see any time soon-

*****

*****

*****

*****

*****

*****

And, just to show almost every single color seemingly known to humanity...

I don't know if they helped, but at least it gives one hope, right? Have yourself a great weekend, and remember—just four or five months before we see color again!

8-)

(jim@wmqt.com)

Thursday, 11/16

I think I have my list of cookies set.

As those of you who have reading these forever know, Christmas cookies are a big deal in the Koski household. I make a crapload of them at home and then give most of them away to family and friends, then repeat the whole thing over again when I go over to my parents and make most of THEIR cookies for the holidays.

What can I say? I'm a masochist.

Whenever I sit down to make the ones I give away, I always have to consider it from two different directions. I need to make four or five cookies that I always make—the “traditional” cookies. These are the ones I've made forever, the ones that would get a “why didn't you make?” if I ever decided not to make them. So I know that every year I'm going to make those particular cookies. But I always save a slot for a cookie I've never tried before. While I enjoy making the “traditional” cookies, I also enjoy challenging myself just a little. So each year around this time marks a quest to figure out something different, something out of the ordinary, that I can add along with all the “traditional” cookies.

This year's entry? Lemon rosemary cookies.

Yes, I made cookies with rosemary in them. No, they didn't suck. In fact, I made a test batch for a friend and she said, and I quote, they're “perfectly light and airy cookies with just the right amount of sweet, and the lemon flavor and the rosemary sends it over the top”. And I have to admit, she's right. There's something very addicting about them, despite the fact that they're basically just shortbread cookies with fresh lemon rind and fresh rosemary (but not too much fresh rosemary) added in. I can understand why people might look askew at cookies with rosemary in them; after all, I usually use rosemary on things like pork chops & chicken. But in these cookies?

Yum. And there was an added bonus in that I had to buy a lemon to get the rind while making the cookies. So when I was done with the lemon I juiced it, made myself some lemonade, and you know what I threw in it as an added flavor boost?

Why, rosemary, of course.

I'll be interested to see how the cookies go over with the people who receive them this year. While I realize they're not as “traditional” as the sugar cookies, the chocolate cherry bombs I make, or the Grandma Cookies everyone goes gaga over, I'm hopeful these experiments hit the spot. And who knows—if enough people like them?

Maybe they'll get added to the rotation every year.

(jim@wmqt.com)

Wednesday, 11/15

They can't do this to Loraine!

Well, technically, “they” can, because in this case the “they” is the Marquette County District Court and the “this” is jury duty. That's right; my (much) better half gets to be part of a participatory democracy for up to three different Tuesdays in December, and I feel her pain. Those of you who have read this for a while may recall two or three Decembers ago when I had the exact same call to duty, except mine was for SIX different days during the month.

I was even paid $1.89 (seriously) for the rearranging of my entire month.

While neither Loraine or I balk at doing our civic duty, I find it kind of funny that both of us have gotten called to the same court for the exact same month. I'm not a mathematician (after all, we don't want heads exploding anywhere, do we?), but I would have to think that the odds that both members of a couple getting jury duty during the exact same month of the year would be, well, small. My pea brain says it should be 24 to 1; I'm sure someone out there can calculate them much better than can I, so feel free.

Still, it is what it is. I know when I had to clear six days during the busiest month of the year a few years ago I spent many a night or weekend day at the station, working ahead in case whatever case was coming up actually went to trial. Five out of the six days I was on jury duty the trial was called off; on the sixth, I showed up early that morning and found out a settlement had been reached a few hours before. Still, they did pay me mileage—that $1.89 I previously mentioned—because I had to walk the six blocks from my apartment to the court house.

So the month of schedule disruption wasn't a total waste. I think I bought a bottle of Pepsi with the money.

My hope is that Loraine calls the day before each of her three scheduled dates, and is told that she doesn't need to show up. That's my hope, and given the experience I had a few years ago, that's the assumption we're working on. Hopefully, she'll be able to slide through the month with minimal disruptions, and then we'll both be off the hook for jury duty for the foreseeable future.

Or until next December Whichever comes first. Wish us luck.

(jim@wmqt.com)

Tuesday, 11/14

I don’t get it myself, but that’s okay, because everyone else seems to.

The “it” to which I’m referring is, of course, the Yooper national holiday that starts tomorrow. I myself have never gone hunting and I’m guessing I never will, but I realize that puts me in a minority here in the U.P. And that’s all right; I’ve pretty much made a life of being a little out of the ordinary. So to everyone who IS heading out tonight or tomorrow, I wish you the best of luck. I also hope you stay warm, hangover free, and come home both safe and facial hair-free.

And in the spirit of the holiday, here’s something I wrote last century (no, really, I wrote it last century) and stick up here just about every year on this day. But before I get to that, I do have to mention that today my favorite newborn in the world becomes my favorite 1-year old in the world, as my nephew Abel celebrates his first ever birthday. So happy birthday, Abel. I'm sure this will be your best one ever!

(jim@wmqt.com)

****

“’Twas the Night Before Deer Camp”,

by Jimmy Koski, grade 3.

TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE DEER SEASON

AND ALL THROUGH THE CAMP

HUNTERS WERE UNLOADED BEER CRATES

AND LIGHTING UP LAMPS

THE RIFLES THEY HUNG

IN THE PICKUP WITH CARE

IN HOPES THAT A 10-POINTER

SOON WOULD BE THERE

I IN MY ORANGE

MY BUDDY IN GREEN

SAT DOWN TO A CRIBBAGE GAME

THE BIGGEST EVER SEEN

WE PLAYED THROUGH THE NIGHT

AND EMPTIED THOSE CRATES

BUT MORNING SOON CAME

WE DIDN’T WANT TO BE LATE

WE SET OUT AT SUNRISE

AT DAWN’S EARLY LIGHT

PUT DOWN A BIG BAIT PILE

IN HOPES THAT BAMBI WOULD BITE

WE SAT AND WE WAITED

AND WAITED SOME MORE

I KEPT MY EYES OPEN

MY BUDDY STARTED TO SNORE

WHEN TO MY SURPRISE

STANDING RIGHT BY A TREE

WAS A BIG 12-POINT BUCK

MY PANTS I DID...WELL, NEVER MIND ABOUT THAT

I BROUGHT UP MY RIFLE

I LINED UP THE DEER

THEN MY BUDDY WOKE UP AND YELLED

“HEY--WHERE’S THE BEER?”

THE BUCK RAN AWAY

I LOWERED MY GUN

MY BUDDY JUST LAUGHED

SAID “LET’S HAVE SOME FUN”

WE WENT BACK TO DEER CAMP

AND HAD US A BALL

SO LET ME SAY THIS--

GOOD LUCK DEER HUNTING TO ALL...

(copyright 1999)

Monday, 11/13

I don't think I've ever been so thankful for a soundproof studio.

As you know, we've had a run of bad luck recently. We're still dropping out on the air here and there, and we're no closer to figuring out what's causing it (although, in my mind, the fact that it's clustered around the top and the bottom of the hour HAS to have something to do with it). And last Thursday, we had another problem start to plague us, although thankfully in a way that no one listening noticed. Last Thursday, a pipe going to the furnace in our building burst, sending water shooting everywhere. And while we didn't have to deal with the worst of it, water flooded the floors of and got sucked up into the drywall in our bathroom and back conference room. Serv-Pro was called in to clean it up; the water's now gone from the floors, and to dry out the drywall there have been six industrial-sized air fans blowing into holes drilled into the walls of the affected areas.

Guess whose office is right next to the affected areas?

Now, if you didn't immediately answer “yours, Jim”, you haven't been reading these long enough. Of course my office is right next to the flooded areas. And while I'm thankful (very thankful, in fact) that my office didn't get any water it in, having six industrial air blowers running 24 hours a day right outside my door isn't how I thought I'd be spending these past few days. While the blowers basically emit nothing but white noise, the white noise they emit is so loud that I can't hear anything my co-workers say, I can't hear the radio playing in my office, and in some instances I can't even hear myself think.

Not that the last is necessarily a bad thing.

You do get used to the noise after a while. At least, you get as used to it as you can get to something that would probably deafen you over time. And since you basically hear it every place you go on the station, after a while it's kind of like background noise. It's there, and you tune it start to tune it out. Except, of course, until you go into our air studio, which is soundproof, and you close the door. You then notice something that takes a second to register in your brain, but when it does register it's glorious.

It's the (literal) sound of silence.

You don't realize just how loud those blowers actually are until you're suddenly not exposed to them. Instead of hearing this wave of white noises all you can hear, assuming the air monitors are turned down, is the soft, subtle sound of computer hard drives gently whirring in their boxes, oblivious to the audio chaos that surrounds them. If you strain, you can hear fans that are blowing cool air into a few pieces of equipment. And if you close your eyes and listen, really listen, you can even hear yourself breathe.

It's quite the shock to the system.

It's funny, because I usually don't mind having a little noise in my work life. I always have music on, whether it's what we're playing or new stuff that I'm checking out. I myself am always making noise whether by talking to myself or horribly singing or by providing my own sound effects track to whatever I'm currently doing. So I'm obviously not adverse to noise. I guess it just takes having six industrial-sized air blowers to make one realize just how blessedly peaceful silence can be.

And that's why I'm really glad we have a sound-proof air studio.

(jim@wmqt.com), hopeful the air blowers get taken out later today. Keep your fingers crossed!