If you don't mind, we're gonna spend a
couple of days talking about books. First, based on this excerpt of
an Amazon review, which book do you think this person is talking
about?
“Since the dawn of civilization,
every major culture has spawned at least one immortal work that has
withstood the erosion of time and has endured as a monument of that
culture's literary heritage. Ancient Greece had the Odyssey. Rome had
the Aeneid. England had Hamlet, Germany Faust, Russia War and
Peace.
And for 20th-Century America, there is this book. Its sweeping tableau of modern life, its biting critique of post-capitalist materialism, and its trenchant insights into the predicament of modern man mark it as one of the greatest novels of all time.”
And for 20th-Century America, there is this book. Its sweeping tableau of modern life, its biting critique of post-capitalist materialism, and its trenchant insights into the predicament of modern man mark it as one of the greatest novels of all time.”
What do you think? Is the reviewer
speaking of Hemingway, or Updike, or Burroughs, or a lost masterpiece
by Fitzgerald? Well, not quite. However, if you said the reviewer
was speaking of “The Lennon Sisters: The Secret of Holiday
Island”, you'd be absolutely right.
Saturday night after watching “High
School Bowl” Loraine and I were joking about the show that follows
it, Lawrence Welk. I don't know how the subject of the “lovely”
Lennon Sisters, members of that show's endless cast, came up, but
Loraine remembered that as a kid, she may have read what she thought
was a bizarre murder mystery featuring the singing siblings. Now,
why someone would actually write a a murder mystery about sisters who
sang on “The Lawrence Welk Show” is beyond me, but someone did,
Loraine read it as a kid, and to help her make sure that she was
remembering correctly, I did an internet search for it, found out you
can still buy it on Amazon, and then read what might be possibly the
single best review ever written for a book.
At least the single best
tongue-in-cheek book review ever written.
I have no idea who wrote the review. I
have no idea if they actually ever read the book, or just decided to
write the review and stick it on Amazon. But what I do know is that
it may be one of the funniest things I've ever read. I'm guessing
that very few people would ever search Amazon for “The Lennon
Sisters: The Secret of Holiday Island”, and because of that this
amazing piece of writing is just sitting there, hidden on a musty
corner of the Internet. I personally never would've found if it
hadn't been for the serendipity of reruns of “The Lawrence Welk
Show” following the TV the show I host, and with me being married
to a woman who actually thought she knew something about a book very
few people have ever heard of.
I mean...could anyone even calculate
the odds of all that ever happening?
Like I said, the review made me laugh
for almost five minutes straight, and since those incalculable odds
mean that most people would never even know the review exists, I
wanted to share it. Maybe you'll get a laugh out of it, too.
Tomorrow, the story of another book.
(ps—because it's so good, here's the full review of the book--
“Since the dawn of civilization,
every major culture has spawned at least one immortal work that has
withstood the erosion of time and has endured as a monument of that
culture's literary heritage. Ancient Greece had the Odyssey. Rome had
the Aeneid. England had Hamlet, Germany Faust, Russia War and
Peace.
And for 20th-Century America, there is Schroeder's "The Lennon Sisters: The Secret of Holiday Island." Its sweeping tableau of modern life, its biting critique of post-capitalist materialism, and its trenchant insights into the predicament of modern man mark it as one of the greatest novels of all time. Readers are struck dumb by the skill, compassion, and power with which Schroeder portrays the characters populating her vast canvas -- Deedee, the eldest sister, with one foot in the past and other diffidently testing the waters of modernity; Peggy, the Parsifal-like optimist, unable to comprehend the darkness that ineluctably engulfs her family as the brilliant plot speeds forward; Taggart, the brooding embodiment of a future both fascinating and awful; and Janet, the wary, wide-eyed everychild through whose neophyte eyes the reader witnesses the entire panorama. And the propulsive drama of the story, with its searing eroticism, its gripping climax, and its unforgettable denouement, assure it a permanent place in the pantheon of world literature.”
And for 20th-Century America, there is Schroeder's "The Lennon Sisters: The Secret of Holiday Island." Its sweeping tableau of modern life, its biting critique of post-capitalist materialism, and its trenchant insights into the predicament of modern man mark it as one of the greatest novels of all time. Readers are struck dumb by the skill, compassion, and power with which Schroeder portrays the characters populating her vast canvas -- Deedee, the eldest sister, with one foot in the past and other diffidently testing the waters of modernity; Peggy, the Parsifal-like optimist, unable to comprehend the darkness that ineluctably engulfs her family as the brilliant plot speeds forward; Taggart, the brooding embodiment of a future both fascinating and awful; and Janet, the wary, wide-eyed everychild through whose neophyte eyes the reader witnesses the entire panorama. And the propulsive drama of the story, with its searing eroticism, its gripping climax, and its unforgettable denouement, assure it a permanent place in the pantheon of world literature.”
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