Wednesday, 3/1

I see what you're doing there, sugar. And I'm not gonna let you get away with it.

I had to make cookies last night, and I got to open a brand-new package of sugar. As I was doing so I noticed two things, one being that, much like flour, paper containers really are not the best way to store things like sugar.

The other? Well, it was something printed on said paper container--

Yup. They're trying to make sugar sound healthy by saying it's fat-free. I mean...technically it's true, much in the same way cyanide could market itself as being “gluten-free”, but that doesn't make it any better for you.

Really, sugar, it doesn't.

Now, I have nothing at all against sugar. I use it each and every time I bake, and even, on occasion, when I cook. It's not evil (like, say, cyanide), and as long as you're aware of its calorie content you should be fine. But to simply ignore that fact and call yourself “fat-free” is a little...cynical, at best, and downright misleading at worst. I mean, I'm hoping there won't be any people out there who look at the label and think “hey—no fat. I can eat as much as I want”.

But I've also been on the Internet recently. I'm well aware of just how stupid people can be when they want.

In the end, I know it doesn't matter. Sugar can label itself as “fat free” because, well, it is. They're not lying. Sugar is just as fat free as cardboard, gasoline, plywood, and cyanide. So if you're baking something and run out of sugar, don't worry.

You can always substitute one of those other ingredients I just mentioned. After all, just like sugar, they're also “fat-free”.

(jim@wmqt.com), who would hope that everyone reading this knows that last line is just a joke and in no way a suggestion that you substitute plywood for sugar. Yet, I have been on the Internet recently, and know just how stupid people can be when they want, so...

DON'T USE ANY OF THOSE INGREDIENTS AS A SUBSTITUTE FOR SUGAR!)