Friday, October 18, 2019

Friday, 10/18


I get to touch the pumpkins this weekend!

Don't worry; that's not a euphemism for anything I wouldn't mention in here. I literally get to touch the pumpkins this weekend, probably breaking the law while I do so, and maybe even getting caught in the act on surveillance video.

See? I really AM a typical resident of downtown Marquette.

Let me explain, lest you think I live some kind of weird secret life that requires me to carry around money for bail at all times. Every year on the corner of Third and Washington Street the DDA puts up a little Halloween display that includes a bunch of pumpkins. And because some people who frequent downtown Marquette, especially after the sun goes down but before last call, like to wreck havoc on things, the Halloween display includes a sign that says “Don't Touch the Pumpkins”. You'd think it'd be self-explanatory, but as I've written in here before, sometimes between the hours of 11pm and 3am you need to explain a LOT to the people hanging around downtown Marquette.

Anyway, a couple of years ago, I saw the sign and for a moment turned into a rebel (or, as Loraine put it, a 9-year old). I reached my hand over, and touched a pumpkin. I didn't do anything bad to it; I didn't grab it inappropriately, I didn't toss it against a building, I didn't stick it lying helplessly in the street. Nope; I just touched it. And thus began a yearly tradition wherein, on our way to the Farmer's Market or Babycakes or The Portside, I will reach over and touch a pumpkin. Yes, I know it's a stupid and/or childish thing to do. But when has that stopped me, right?

Right?

So anyway, I noticed the display is up again for the year, meaning that this weekend I'll get to touch a pumpkin. And, of course, the stupidity factor is ratcheted up a bit, because the pumpkin display sits right underneath one of the security cameras the city of Marquette installed to catch the nighttime denizens of Marquette as they do stupid and/or childish things. So if for some reason you don't hear me on the air Monday, or if you're checking the police log in the Mining Journal and notice something about “pumpkin assault” on the 200 West block of Washington Street, you'll know why.

It's all because of my compulsion to touch the pumpkins.

On that note, have yourself a great weekend, and what the heck—go out and touch a pumpkin yourself, if that's what you wanna do. No judgment here!

8-)



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