It wouldn't be strange to put “cow” on one's Christmas list, would it? I mean, that's something a normal person would do, right?
Just asking for a friend.
One of my big projects this past weekend was putting together my annual birthday/ Christmas list, alerting family members as to what they may consider picking up when shopping for those two events in December. For most of my life, I've included a few items that I know no one in the world could get me, either because of cost or because of the laws of physics. But they're things I'd enjoy. I started off all those years ago with “world peace” and “my own spaceship”, and about a decade ago I added “a 25th hour to the day” to the suggestions. And now I've started tossing a fourth item onto the list.
One of these--
I mean, technically, I'm not asking for a REAL cow, but a calendar or a toy. And I know you're shaking your head right now and going “cow?” As I always say, I have NO idea why I find cows so fascinating, but I do. And by adding it to the flight of fancy with which I end my annual birthday/ Christmas list it just shows that cows have made the leap up to equality with extra time and a spaceship.
But think of how cool it would be if someone DID get me a cow. It would be sitting there under the tree on Christmas morning (or, in our case, because we have a tree that's only two feet high, more likely ON the Christmas tree), looking at me with those big cow eyes as my human eyes wept tears of joy. I could then take it for walks and play with it and watch our very small backyard fill up with cow droppings in a matter of just a few days.
It would be glorious.
However, much like my yearly requests for world peace, my own spaceship, and an extra hour to the day, I realize that my requests for my own cow will go unheeded. And that's okay, I guess. After all, despite all appearances to the contrary, I AM mature enough to realize that having a cow as a pet, especially in one of the most densely packed neighborhood in the city, would not be a good thing. It wouldn't be fair to our landlords, it wouldn't be fair to our neighbors, and, I guess, it wouldn't be fair to the cow.
But a boy can dream, right? Especially with both his birthday and Christmas coming up.
8-)
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